Reverb10 (24 and 25)

Reverb10 

December 24 Prompt – Everything’s OK
What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?

Any moment that I am upset and I can turn around and laugh at myself. Sometimes I forget to laugh. That's when things are most not OK. This isn't a discovery I've made recently. For that I'm grateful.

I don't disagree with this question (my roommate does). Everything will be OK. Things won't be perfect, but they will be ok. Ok is the idea that your world won't end, that you will move on, that even the worst circumstances can't fully stop you. Ok is acknowledging that stubborn child inside who knows what she wants and will make you work to get it. Ok is living through rough moments and knowing this too shall pass. Everything will be ok. Even realizing I lost boyfriend #4 as a friend, that he'll never talk to me again unless some strange miracle happens can be ok. It's learning to move beyond that in-the-moment mindset, to accept things and come to term with unhappy events.

I don't think everything is always ok. Breakups aren't ok at the beginning. Disappointment and failure aren't ok either. But all things WILL BE. The future tense is important here. We all manage to cope and find ways to move past things. When we move pass these things, it will be ok.

This mindset that I have just tried to explain isn't something I'm good at living. I understand it and I try to embrace it, but I still live in moments -- moments when I'm crying and shaking and unhappy, moments when I want to curl up into a ball and rock back and forth, moments when I feel like loneliness eats away at me. Then, when it's all over, I try to remember to look back and laugh at myself. I try to remember to say, "See? It's ok now."

December 25 – Photo – a present to yourself
Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you.

 I'm a bit kooky and strange. It's one of the things I like most about myself. When I get bored, I try to entertain myself with whatever I have.  I assume it makes others smile; I know I smile. Sometimes that's enough to keep my happy.

We were waiting for food at a restaurant. One of my friends shot this picture as I sat making funny faces. 

<3
Hao